On watches

Connoisseurs call them timepieces. I call them overpriced watches.

When I was my younger self, I researched and pored through all the finest watches the world has to offer: Patek Phillipe, Audemars Piguet, A.Lange & Sohne, Rolex, Cartier, Vacheron Constantin, and many others. I looked into clean designs to the most complicated baubles. My calling them baubles should give you a clue into what I think about watches.

Don’t get me wrong. If you want to wear a fine watch, feel free to do so. A watch is the most socially acceptable piece of jewelry a man can wear other than his wedding ring.

But unlike a fountain pen which has a practical purpose, wearing a watch is redundant when carrying a cell phone. Besides, the rich-rich don’t need to know the exact time because we determine when things happen.

Watches, then, are little more than showy objects that add extra weight on your arm and get in the way when doing work. They are an unnecessary luxury. I can tolerate luxury. And I can even tolerate unnecessary. But I cannot tolerate both.